Ayobami Atanda

My name is Mr. Fresh, but I’m not fresh. You will know later why freshness is far from me. I am a fresh fresher in a popular tertiary institution. I got an admission last year to study a course that I could use to work ANYWHERE. When it happened, I was very happy. If someone rode a horse in my heart, the person would not stumble. I prefer to study a course that would make me work anywhere than to study a course that will confine me to a particular discipline. (Sense will not kill me). The whole issue started yesterday, if I am not mistaken. The management of my school put the amount that we, the fresh students, will pay in our first year on our portals. Right now, I can’t remember the amount because I’m too glad, but I’m sure it is somewhere around 300, 000 naira.

A lot of students have been lamenting about the augmentation. They are saying that ‘it is too much’, ‘they came from poor backgrounds’, ‘where would they get the money’ ‘are public universities now private universities’, amongst other complaints . Instead of joining the bandwagon to lampoon the system, I keep silent. One unique fact about me is that I’m always sensitive about the situations around me and I don’t cry foul play when the odds are against me. But this, the odds are in my favour. Some (can I say “notorious”) punters have said that it will not be of our benefit, but I will say that the new increment in school fees will favour me and my family.

I’m always with my senses, aren’t I? When I refuse to talk, some have thought that I come from a well-to-do family. Nonetheless, if I must be sincere, they gave birth to me with no spoon, even if I was, it would be a plastic or metal one. Getting here is by God’s grace and it is God who will see me through. I get little or no help from my people but I am optimistic that the increase in the fees will not halt my education until a Ph.D. level, is all I desire.

The solution is here with us. The federal government signed the student loan bill recently. I am banking on that. I will take the loan from 100 to 400 level. By the time I graduate, I will owe the federal government JUST 1.2 million naira, just A CHICKEN FEED. The value of my you-can-work-anywhere certificate is worth billions of naira. Why will I be concerned about the loan? I believe (100%) that I will pay it easily. Immediately I complete my youth service, I will start using my certificate. Since they tell me that I can WORK ANYWHERE, I can take it to work in the bank, hospital, law firm, embassy, aviation, and work as a specialist. I have been trained to work anywhere. No cap! But as a Naija student, who knows the worth of money, I only envisage working in an oil company as an engineer. I need to be swimming in oil money.

I only pity the students who are trained to be professionals in specific disciplines, unlike me who will be a jack of all trades –work anywhere. If one of them takes the loan from 100 level to 500 or 600 level, the person, borrowing not less than 400,000 naira for each session, will be owing 2 million naira or 2.4 million naira before they graduate.

However, there is an assurance everywhere. Jobs are waiting for us, aren’t they? By the time we graduate, every graduate in the country will have been employed even though we have JUST 33.3% of graduates who are unemployed and 12% of the employed are underemployed. I have the belief that when we graduate, they will be begging us for employment. We will choose the ones we like, the ones that can fetch us at least 1 million naira, worst still, 800,000 naira. We will leave the mushroom jobs that pay 80,000 naira or thereabout for those who don’t acquire tertiary education.

They say the suffering of today is not worthy to be compared with the glory that will be revealed in us. I know the economic situation is unpalatable to the students. I will eat the little I have. I will engage in some part-time jobs to keep my body and soul together. Most times, I know my fate is to eat cassava flakes that is embellished with floating berries. If I have sweetener, fine. If I don’t, contentment is a great gain. I will struggle to finish since there is an assurance that there is light at the end of the tunnel. I will read copious materials, do numberless assignments, and sit exams where I will always ‘critically‘ and ‘exhaustively‘ analyse the questions. In the end, I will graduate, and a multimillion naira job will be waiting for me for studying a you-can-work-anywhere course. Therefore, if I have this SURE hope, why would I not be happy to borrow 1 million naira plus to study a you-can-work-anywhere course? Purrrrr!